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post Jun 17, 2005 - 3:23 AM
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acenova



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So I have a very dear friend to me, on that I told I loved in Spain (not hooked up btw) but she has an exboyfriend of whom (3-4 yrs ago) played her, cheated and proceeded to talk **** about me and her after they broke up. Now its been a long time since I've seen the guy. Lately, I've seen him twice, including tonight. Now I don't know what to do. I realize that most of the guys out there, I could take in a fight, I'm 6'3" and 200 lbs and about 10% fat at most and I know how to fight. But see, I'm not an "In your face" type of guy. I'm somewhat peaceful and will not fight, I could if I had to, but was always taught to avoid fights at all costs but if you know its going to go down, throw the first punch.

Now, the story, the first time I saw this guy after the event, (last week) I said whats up or whatever, but didn't really talk to him and didn't really want to and made that fairly apparent. Told my dear friend about it and she got angry at me and we kinda quarreled over it. Shes over what he did, but shes not over the fact that no one told him off for it. I didn't tell him off when I saw him last because for one, it was a long time ago, and for two, thats not me! She was more or less dissapointed and the worst thing for me to do (in my mind) is to dissapoint her. She means so much to me that I would do anything, including die, for her. I saw the guy again tonight, and just last night, I realized my approach to the situation and how I wanted to handle it. To me, I didn't see an opportunity to talk to him really because the guys a buddy of my friend Danny's and out of respect for him I didn't really say anything. I forewarned Danny tonight that the next time I see him I'm going to have a talk with him. Its going to be non-militant and honestly, I'm not looking to fight the guy and still hate on him, I'm just going to tell him whats up in a way that doesn't envoke a fight.

The problem: I feel terrible for not saying anything tonight, I feel terrible for not saying anything last time I saw him, and I feel obligated to say something to him next time not for my sake, but for closure for my good friend. Am I in the right? Am I making the right decision to confront him. This is a girl that I've been in love with for a long time but more than anything I value her friendship. I feel as though I'm a coward for not saying anything the last couple times, and I feel I will be a coward if I don't say anything. I've never thought of myself as a coward, just as a non confrontational guy. What would you guys say, am I a coward for not saying anything, or am I not a bad guy for not saying anything? I feel like a crappy friend and a friggin pussy, and I don't like feeling this way. I don't like dissapointing a friend. Guess I just wanted to see what you guys thought.
post Jun 17, 2005 - 3:33 AM
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macavely



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well if this happened alotng time ago .. let it go .. if your firend still hasn't then she needs to grow up .. i been in your spot and women no matter how much you care about them will end up playing you.. so you could become and asshole to everyone for her then she'll me some other guy forget about u and then you left with no friends cause of how you acted...

just let things be no reason to do somethign stupid for no real reason .... don't even talk to the guy .. cause yea your big and all .. and since u don't fight much u might end up getting ur ass kicked..


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