Dane Cook, Post your fav quotes Options

[ILuvMyCelica95]

Ok so Dane Cook is the best comic ever, if you don't know who he is you must live under a rock... anyway I'm all excited because im getting tickets this week to see him live in NYC in September...so post your fav quote...

This is one of my favs:

"I'll tell you what dream used to scare me as a kid, used to actually totally give me night-mares, remeber those Kool-Aid comercials? Where that, no that big talking bowl of punch, he would come crashing through your ****ing wall in the living room! You wouldn't even know know he would just BOOUF!!! *oh yeah!, oh yeah!, oh yeah!!!* "Right, and the little kids were all excited, "YES, YES!!!" "and then they would drink out of him after debris fell in his open dumb head, he would pour himself, *OH YEAH! OH YEAH!* "...him and his crazy tights...I don't like that, I don't like when juice wears tights, it's a horrible combination, a bowl of juice wearing tights, **** drinking out of him, If that was me I'd be like *oh no no no no no, you fix that wall before dad gets home from work, hes gonna beat me with a belt, he's not gonna believe a talking bowl of fruit punch came in here, you stupid idiot, yeah comin' through the wall is real ****in' cool, useing the front door is cool! Don't touch me you drink! Don't touch me you giant beverage, you are sweating or condincating I will kick you in the tights and you will go down your very top-heavy, you glass bitch, you glass bastard! OH YEAH! Oh No!*"

[Supersprynt]

When your waiting in line at the bank, tap the person in front of you and as you do that start putting on a pair of gloves and say "now would be a good time to leave."