Dane Cook, Post your fav quotes Options

[ILuvMyCelica95]

Ok so Dane Cook is the best comic ever, if you don't know who he is you must live under a rock... anyway I'm all excited because im getting tickets this week to see him live in NYC in September...so post your fav quote...

This is one of my favs:

"I'll tell you what dream used to scare me as a kid, used to actually totally give me night-mares, remeber those Kool-Aid comercials? Where that, no that big talking bowl of punch, he would come crashing through your ****ing wall in the living room! You wouldn't even know know he would just BOOUF!!! *oh yeah!, oh yeah!, oh yeah!!!* "Right, and the little kids were all excited, "YES, YES!!!" "and then they would drink out of him after debris fell in his open dumb head, he would pour himself, *OH YEAH! OH YEAH!* "...him and his crazy tights...I don't like that, I don't like when juice wears tights, it's a horrible combination, a bowl of juice wearing tights, **** drinking out of him, If that was me I'd be like *oh no no no no no, you fix that wall before dad gets home from work, hes gonna beat me with a belt, he's not gonna believe a talking bowl of fruit punch came in here, you stupid idiot, yeah comin' through the wall is real ****in' cool, useing the front door is cool! Don't touch me you drink! Don't touch me you giant beverage, you are sweating or condincating I will kick you in the tights and you will go down your very top-heavy, you glass bitch, you glass bastard! OH YEAH! Oh No!*"

[TheStreetzKing]

you kno that parking garage thats like 40 stories high.. what do they pave that with.. thats not blacktop.. when u drive on it its like a chase scene from chips EEEERRRRRRRRRRCCCHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH .. i mean come on EEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRCCCCCCCCHHHH IM BACKING UPPP... EEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRCCCCCCCCCHHHH WHERES THE DOOR.. ok ok just so your all on the same level as me imma say that one again.. you kno that parking garage thats like 40 stories high.. what do they pave that with..