Women, Is it all of them? Options

[Bigmeanbulldog55]

I'm upset with my girlfriend right now. I've been with her for 4 years now, and she still doesn't understand my passion for cars. You can all read what I've bought for my car in my info. It isn't much. But for some reason she thinks I buy stuff for it all the time. I was telling her I was thinking about bidding on a header online for my car and she got really mad at me. She said, "you don't even need a header, why are you wasting your money?" I just had a birthday, and I felt I should be aloud to maybe buy myself something for a birthday/chirstmas present. I've talked to everyone else in my life, friends and grandpa and mother. They all say, "it's your money, and if that's what you want to spend it on it's okay." I told my girlfriend that all those people said that, but it didn't matter really, because it doesn't matter what anyone else said she is the most important person in my life I can't do something unless she says it's okay. I can't stand her being mad at me. I told her I felt like she's controllling sometimes because she gets mad at me if I don't do exactly what she wants. She got mad at me and told me to spend my money on whatever I wanted and stop caring about what she thought, and it was irritating what I was doing. It feels like no matter what I do, she's mad at me and I can't make her happy. I love her. How do I get her to understand me, and except me?

[95gtschick]

I've been with my boyfriend (fiance... ) for 4 years now as well! He has a HUGE passion for cars. I do too, as most of you know, but when i see him spending money on his car, like, carelessly (as in, he thinks about it for 2 minutes and buys something that's like $5k) then i get upset. Mainly because we're getting married, and can't afford to keep spending on our cars. But then he says he wants to spend what he can, while he can, before we're married. Ok, good point. But we still need to save money.

When you get to the point where you want (if you want) to marry this girl, i think you'll see how she stands. If she's like most girls, she's more than likely thought about marrying you, and she is probably worried how in the future you might spend all this money on your car, if not more, all over again. I'm sure the last thing she wants is to upset you, she's probably just a little worried about your "spending habits" and doesn't see all the good things that you do for her because she's blinded by the so-called "bad".

Give her time, and as i read, things are good now. But i can bet you $500 this conversation between you 2 will come up again and again, it sure did for my fiance and me, but we're over with that now. We've basically made a budget, and realized if we keep spending the way we do, we're not gonna be happy when we get married, living in a ****ty house, not being able to have ANY money left over, etc...

Just TRY to look at it from her point of view. I really understand your situation though, being as though i was in the same position as your girlfriend. It's kinda rough seeing a lot of money being put into a car, when you've been with the guy for years and he says he loves you. Especially if you don't have the same passion for cars.

I think you guys will be fine, as long as you can compromise.

Have a good day!