Starting Over Again......., Kind of hard to admit this stuff, but I ask for advice Options

[Random_Stranger]

Okay, need both the advice from a woman's perspective and men who know how to talk to girls (obviously I am tired of being shy and ready to get back out there). So I am over this whole "Ex" thing now and ready to get back out there. Naturally I am not too too aggressive, but aggressive is necessary in my city as women are not likely to just walk up and talk to you.

So I want some advice on etiquette. Is it okay to ask a chick out who you just met for the first time, let's say if you show up at her work? For instance....

Just tonight coming back from Tuner Tuesdays, I stopped off at a store to get some smokes. A girl about my age asked if I needed help. So I asked for the smokes, showed ID. Then she is like "So how are you doing tonight?" and I was like "Good" then I paused thinking "Why would she even bother talking to me? No one really does that they just ring you up and send your happy ass on your way". I am not the kind to take kindness for general interest, yet I was curious to pursue because she was pretty and had a Fat Booty (which I admit I like that* Here is where you laugh). So I asked her "How is your day?" and she was like "Good actually, and I get off work here in a bit so that is even better" and I was like "Yeah, that is good". Then she was like "Well you take care" and I said "you too" and left.

Now, normally this really doesn't happen to me. The only time it does is when I make eye contact with a girl and she smiles a lot and then we end up talking a bit before I leave. So I dunno how to read women. Was a situation like that just out of kindness? I mean, me personally, would strike up conversations with "regulars" be it man or woman, and if a girl caught my eye, then I try to talk to them. So would a woman operate the same way?

I am lost. It has been awhile (like a few years) since I have started dating (I mean seriously, not just having booty calls here and there from chicks a lil lower than your standards). Looking for something around my level (not saying that I am all that either though). I know this is a stupid thread, but I dunno who else to turn to and it is starting to be kind of a big deal for me. I mean I am 26! I am still young, but this stuff I should have down already!

You guys wanna flame me it is cool, but like I said, I really ask your thoughts.

[MaskedMan]

First off, I would like to say congrats on getting over the EX. It can be hard sometimes, but the best thing you can do is move on and life the rest of your life.

Ray just gave some good examples up there. Replying with an open ended question is always good if you want to keep the conversation going. Asking for a number is perfectly fine, but you can't ask for it right off the bat. There are a few requirements before you can ask for a girls' phone number.

First of all, after you get the conversation started (which you seem capable of doing), you'll need to at least carry on the conversation for about 10-15 minutes (but don't drag it out, if you feel the convo begin to end, then make sure that YOU end it). Look for signs of interest, this can be eye contact, smiling, etc. Sometimes it can just be because it's their job, but oh well. Before you ask for their number, you should at least have exchanged names by then. If not, they will feel like they don't know you well enough. It is okay to ask for a girls' number if she has a bf, however, I personally do not appreciate guys who go after girls who are already taken, but it's your call. You should ask for her number by inviting her to an upcoming event. Example, "Hey my friends and I are having a party this Sunday, you should stop by" At this point you hand her your phone and ask her to put her number in it. Ok, not really ask, but say, "here put your number in it". Then you can follow up with ok here I'll call you right now so you get my number too (this is really just to check that she gave you a REAL number hahaha). And make sure to stay in control and alert. You say that you come off as aggresive, sometimes it works well, but there are different types of aggressive. There's the type that shows you are in control and confident, and there is the type that shows you are desperate. You want to avoid coming off as the latter haha.

But with all that aside, I would like to say that out of all people, I'm surprised that you are making a thread asking for girl advice. Jeff told me that you were a super ladies man!