Long-distance relationships?, I'm going to college next year... Options

[red94celicagt]

Hey guys!

I am graduating this year, and my girlfriend of one year (as of June 24th) is only a junior this year. I live in Akron right now (about 30 mins from cleveland) and I will be going away to college in Cincinnati to study mechanical/electrical engineering. If you don't know, it is a nice 3 hour drive from Akron to Cincinnati (going 75 the whole time). I am wondering if anyone is maintaining a long distance relationship right now and how is it?

I plan to live on campus (duh) but perhaps drive up to akron to see my girlfriend, family and friends every other weekend. I will also be back up on the school breaks and for next summer.

We are pretty serious, going very strong after one year with our only fights being very little ones that we can solve the same day. I have had my fair share of girlfriends in high school, but this one is very different from the rest. We were best friends for almost a year before we started dating, and I know eveyrthing about her and vice versa. Her parents love me as well as her brothers. We've talked about maybe getting married later on (not until I graduate and have a job set up) but the talk is defiantely there.

So do you guys think we can make this work? I figure seeing her 2 weekends a month as well as nightly phone conversations and AIM/webcam things, we can get through this. Any tips from people who have gone through this? Girls, post here and tell me how hard it would be for you to be in a long distance realtionship from your boyfriend and if you had any advice for me to keep this relationship going.

[S_C_M]

I've made a long distance relationship work on two prior occasions, so I say go for it. Sometimes it can be trying, but 3 hours is not that far imo. (Both of my experiences have been at least 600 miles away.) It can work out for you, if you're both honest and trusting.

[shin]

it all depends on how much faith you have in your girl... but i'll say go for it too. it's hard maintaining a long distance relationship cause you'll be missing her by your side so bad.. i know i did... my girl's currently in chicago and i'm in NY... but we're going at it strong.. my previous long distance relationship was in another country... that was a tough one...

[red94celicagt]

thanks guys, but I do agree that trust is one of the msot important things...and that is definately somehting we have

[ILuvMyCelica95]

I was just going to say trust is the most important thing When my ex went away to college we had been together for a year and a half and i trusted him, and we stayed together...untill i found out after 2 1/2 years of dating he was cheating on me the whole time he was away... but yeah he was a jerk. It sounds like it will work out for you. It's def. not easy.

And i didnt mean to make long distance relationships sound bad by telling you my situation. I was also the only one working on the relationship. If you both work at it then it should be fine.

[lagos]

you are going away to school. lots of new temptations will await you. id say put the relationship on hold, cause even if you dont mean to, youll problably end up hooking up with a hot girl at a party sooner or later. then youll look like the asshole.

[playr158]

you are going away to school. lots of new temptations will await you. id say put the relationship on hold, cause even if you dont mean to, youll problably end up hooking up with a hot girl at a party sooner or later. then youll look like the asshole.
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now thats not true lagos

you can make it work
here are a few things you'll need though
THE MOST IMPORTANT OF ALL THINGS
1) good communication without good communication it won't work

the needed things
2) great deal of trust and security in the other person and yourself
to make the right decisions and not place yourself in the position to potentially make the wrong mistake
3) visits try to make them if you can


but mostly #1

[BlackCelicaGT94]

Been there. Done that. Internet sucks cuz he cheated on me with some internet girl! blah!

[lagos]

i dont agree player...heres what i think u need to make it work

1. stay home at all times
2. dont talk to any girls that try to say hi to you at school
3. no beer drinking or taking drugs
4. no frat parties.
5. make up a romor that you have and std
6. tell you girlfreind to do the same

good luck!

[dustin15brown]

I dated a girl form alabama when I'm in indiana... didn't work out at all after about 3 months... too hard, but I say go for it if she's worth it... I never anna have the what if's when i know i can try my hardest and if i fail then i fail, but i gave it my all... know what i mean?

[acenova]

I've had a long distance relationship for about a year. Previous relationship of course, but we made it work. I don't know though, it was a lot harder on her than on me. But I will say that girls, regardless of their trust in you, can get very suspicious and insecure knowing you're at a Unviersity and w/ all the BS that they hear about college and college freshman. If you're willing to possibly deal w/ a girlfriend who may be very insecure and such, then I say go for it. But I can say that you may most likely fight more. But I do have a buddy who's got a long distance relationship and they're great. Considering the circumstances, she being your best friend and GF, I say keep with it and decided after going to school.

[Yota]

I dated my ex for 2 1/2 years before we started college. It is going to be difficult for you. New people will always come across your path. It might not work out. Be prepared for anything because I certainly wasn't when my ex broke up with me.

I don't regret trying to make it work with her. Its funny, because now that she is home I've seen her a little bit and it seems like things between us are starting to rekindle.

Good luck with it all. If things dont work out over the school year, make sure you remain friends with her. You never know what could come up in the future.

[Blakout16]

yar, i'm in one right now as we speak and we dated for a month and decided i'd go ahead and make her mine after all that and we've been goin out for a month now... she's lives about an hours drive and yes she goes to college (running start program) and i no doubtingly trust her, well even if she did cheat on me theres no way i'd ever find out unless she told a friend one time and then that friend got mad at her one day and decides to tell me... but i completely trust her and love her kinda surprisingly i've only seen this girl less the the amount of times on both of my hands (less than 10 times) lol.... which is sad in a way.

[red94celicagt]

hey thanks guys for all the input.

I am going to be very trusting of her and she prmises to not freak out on me for things she may think or hear. I will be visiting her at least twice a month not including vacations. I am going to keep it going throughout college, but if it becomes too difficult I will talk it over with her and we may decide to take a break or something. thanks again, any more input is always welcomed


BTW playr, communication has always been good for us...even if a guy makes a small pass at her, she will tell me later about it. I think with the right amount of communication and honesty will make it work

[Hanyo]

i've never seen a long distance relationship work..

there is just too many temptations in college...

but good luck with yours.. i'm sure if you are determined to keep it together things will be fine.

[Jen]

Okay, I have been in two.. and they CAN work.. but it takes a lot of dedication, trust, resistance, etc.

If you are the type that need constant affection and attention, like me, this is not for you.. and it won't work.

Lagos is right in every aspect.

[red94celicagt]

I guess the way I see it, I AM going to flirt with other girls...I do now, she IS going to flirt with other guys, she does now. But the difference is that I know that night she will be there for me at home when I call her, and that since we are so trusting and alike, we know to never take it too far. If we ever did, weather by accident or on purpose, we would tell eachother and find a way to deal with it (take a break, flowers in the mail, w/e it takes )

[Jen]

You think that now.. wait until it actually happens.. and I'm being serious.. I know from experience. It's A LOT harder than you think.

[red94celicagt]

Yea, like I said for right now when I enter college I will still be dating her. All depending on what happens will determine if we want to take a break or stay friends or keep going strong. I personally can see myself spending the rest of my life with her (sure call me young) but that will not happen until after grad school. If we keep it going with little or no major problems, I say why doubt it?

[Jen]

Yeah, I can see myself spending the rest of my life with the person I'm with now.. and yeah.. I'm only 18 too. But, we will PROBABLY get married next year.

Like I said, it can work.. it's just hard. Good luck.