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![]() Enthusiast ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Joined May 22, '03 From NOVA Currently Offline Reputation: 16 (100%) ![]() |
QUOTE One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.
Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me." I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!" So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear... "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?" Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep. The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for each outfit." We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier." I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it." Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, "WHAT?" I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?" Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that bitch knows I'm smarter than her. |
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![]() Enthusiast ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Joined Jan 28, '05 From Redondo Beach, CA Currently Offline Reputation: 86 (100%) ![]() |
priceless
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![]() Enthusiast ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Joined Aug 17, '03 From Bloomington, Indiana Currently Offline Reputation: 62 (98%) ![]() |
lmao that is freaking funny
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![]() Enthusiast ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Joined May 25, '06 From Hong Kong Currently Offline Reputation: 256 (100%) ![]() |
Good one!
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![]() Enthusiast ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Joined Jun 30, '03 From O-town, FL Currently Offline Reputation: 0 (0%) ![]() |
hahahaaa, saved
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Enthusiast ![]() ![]() Joined Jan 6, '06 From Tennessee Currently Offline Reputation: 0 (0%) ![]() |
Wow. Just wow.
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![]() Enthusiast ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Joined Oct 30, '04 From So Cal Currently Offline Reputation: 13 (100%) ![]() |
LOLOL!!!
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![]() Enthusiast ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Joined Jul 14, '03 From Jacksonville, FL Currently Offline Reputation: 2 (100%) ![]() |
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Enthusiast ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Joined Jun 29, '03 Currently Offline Reputation: 0 (0%) ![]() |
LMAO nice.
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![]() Enthusiast ![]() ![]() Joined Oct 11, '05 From Ajax, Ontario Currently Offline Reputation: 2 (100%) ![]() |
lmao thats awsome
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![]() Enthusiast ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Joined Dec 9, '05 From Bedford, TX Currently Offline Reputation: 11 (100%) ![]() |
omg man. i think i would got kicked in the balls if i told my girl that. but *high five* that made my day. whoa
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![]() Enthusiast ![]() ![]() ![]() Joined Jul 7, '04 From Germantown, WI Currently Offline Reputation: 0 (0%) ![]() |
LOL thats pretty good
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Enthusiast ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Joined Sep 18, '04 From Manitoba, Canada Currently Offline Reputation: 1 (100%) ![]() |
that's pretty great lol
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Enthusiast ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Joined May 3, '04 From pittsburgh Currently Offline Reputation: 0 (0%) ![]() |
read that before and it never gets old...WOMEN TAKE NOTE
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![]() Enthusiast ![]() ![]() ![]() Joined Jul 31, '05 From Southern California Currently Offline Reputation: 7 (100%) ![]() |
BWAHAHHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!
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![]() Enthusiast ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Joined Oct 5, '05 From NE Currently Offline Reputation: 6 (100%) ![]() |
SHE GOT OWNED! that is hilarious
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![]() Enthusiast ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Joined Dec 8, '05 From torrance/carson, ca Currently Offline Reputation: 11 (100%) ![]() |
hahahaha, that was great.
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Enthusiast ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Joined Mar 3, '05 From Hollywood, FL Currently Offline Reputation: 0 (0%) ![]() |
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I CANT STOP LAUGHING!!!!!!!
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To survive, thats to find meaning, in the suffering.... ![]() |
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![]() Enthusiast ![]() ![]() ![]() Joined Sep 29, '02 From Sterling Heights, Michigan Currently Offline Reputation: 0 (0%) ![]() |
WOW...I'm a woman and I thought this was hilarious!!
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![]() Enthusiast ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Joined Jan 10, '04 From Shoreline, WA Currently Offline Reputation: 4 (100%) ![]() |
thats pretty funny, but dang that guy is a total a$$, just because she just wanted to cuddle that night, its guys like that, that piss me off.
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Lo-Fi Version | Time is now: April 23rd, 2025 - 9:13 AM |