Starting Over Again......., Kind of hard to admit this stuff, but I ask for advice Options

[Random_Stranger]

First off, I would like to say congrats on getting over the EX. It can be hard sometimes, but the best thing you can do is move on and life the rest of your life.

Ray just gave some good examples up there. Replying with an open ended question is always good if you want to keep the conversation going. Asking for a number is perfectly fine, but you can't ask for it right off the bat. There are a few requirements before you can ask for a girls' phone number.

First of all, after you get the conversation started (which you seem capable of doing), you'll need to at least carry on the conversation for about 10-15 minutes (but don't drag it out, if you feel the convo begin to end, then make sure that YOU end it). Look for signs of interest, this can be eye contact, smiling, etc. Sometimes it can just be because it's their job, but oh well. Before you ask for their number, you should at least have exchanged names by then. If not, they will feel like they don't know you well enough. It is okay to ask for a girls' number if she has a bf, however, I personally do not appreciate guys who go after girls who are already taken, but it's your call. You should ask for her number by inviting her to an upcoming event. Example, "Hey my friends and I are having a party this Sunday, you should stop by" At this point you hand her your phone and ask her to put her number in it. Ok, not really ask, but say, "here put your number in it". Then you can follow up with ok here I'll call you right now so you get my number too (this is really just to check that she gave you a REAL number hahaha). And make sure to stay in control and alert. You say that you come off as aggresive, sometimes it works well, but there are different types of aggressive. There's the type that shows you are in control and confident, and there is the type that shows you are desperate. You want to avoid coming off as the latter haha.

But with all that aside, I would like to say that out of all people, I'm surprised that you are making a thread asking for girl advice. Jeff told me that you were a super ladies man!

Wow! Not bad Derrick! Not bad at all! I also like the examples that Ray gave and Jeunesse, you're right. I can make it happen. I was told to not bother asking a girl if she has a BF and she is likes him, she won't do it, but if she don't then she will. If you find out she does, then just stop. I had a hot girl ask me for my number while i was with my ex, but I told that girl I can't talk to her because it wouldn't be right for my ex. After me and my ex broke up, not a day has gone by where I didn't hope I ran into that chick. She was HOT and this is just not by my own opinion. lol

[Jeunesse]

Don't stop if you found out that she had a BF.. stop if you found out that she's married. Dating/BF/GF is still choosing the right partner. Married already chosed but still has the possibility to choose again. get it?

[Random_Stranger]

Don't stop if you found out that she had a BF.. stop if you found out that she's married. Dating/BF/GF is still choosing the right partner. Married already chosed but still has the possibility to choose again. get it?

That's is true. Just because you are BF/GF gives no obligations. I like the way you think buddy. That is so right on! If more people thought like that, there would be a lot less psychos in the world, and my friend Brent would have less enemies or guys trying to stab him. Huh Brent?!

[jcaron9gt4]

Of course BF/GF have certain meaning and obligations. I know I would be pissed off if some dude was trying to get with my gf, knowing she had a bf. Have some respect and back off if they have a bf/gf. Unless the girl could careless about having a bf and it is nothing serious, but if she is persistent and says, I have a bf, then do not pursue it.

[masterluie214]

Have going down that road my self personaly I have learned just to let what ever happens happen look at it like this if you ask for her number or to go on a date or even to grab some coffy (something not as pushy and will make them feels safer being with someone they dont know) the worst she could say is No and then nothing has changed you go back to your normal life sometimes you will be suprised and get a yes and go from there just let what ever happens happen in its own time. My girl and I now have been together for 4 years and still strong (have had our problems but still ) and when I met her I was no where neer over my ex(psyco) (hens the problems ^).... so as I see it you already got that part out of the way lol anyway good luck with the hunt you know we all love the hunt.


Luis

[MaskedMan]

Ahh the hunt, the hunt is always the best part, is it not? It seems like a lot of guys say that they've dated "psyco ex's", and it find it kind of funny . I have my share of psyco ex's too, but I'm sure there is always a story to top the ones I have. Anyways, asking a girl out who has a boyfriend isn't impossible, it's just more of a morale decision. She could have a guy that really cares about her, and here you are trying to steal his gf away from him. Ofcourse it's her decision to go after guys or not while she's already in a relationship, but if that's the kind of girl she is, you really have got to wonder if she's the type you really want.

[Random_Stranger]

Guys I need your advice again.



Scenario:

Walking to my car at college. Parking is a pain, and a girl asked me if I was leaving. Now this is the second time I have been approached and both times the girls were HOT. I think nothing of it, because it is hard to find parking. I pointed out where I am parked, although I couldn't see my car because of a truck, which I did point out to her. She was like "Well, do you need a ride to your car? I think it will be easier that way for both of us", so I got in. Oh, she drives a BMW SUV by the way. We get up there and I get in and get out so she can park. I was curious, so I drove around back her way and asked her if she wanted a ride to the school, and she got a big smile and was like "ReallY?! Thanks!" so she got in, I asked her her name, she told me (Ruby), I told her mine. She asked if I was Mexican, I told her I am Flip, she asked my name, I told her, she was like "Does it mean Warrior?! LOL", and I told her it meant "Lucky or Bearer of Luck". She said "Oh you got a ride, so you were lucky", and I was like "Yeah, from a pretty lady, so I suppose I am quite lucky". She then said "Oh noooo..... (saying she wasn't all that)" and I was like "Yes, you are very pretty". So we got up to the school and she said "Thanks", and I said "have a good day". Then I drove off.


Conclusion:

Parking? It was necessary to make good time and convenience. The ride offer on her part? Who would just trust some guy to get in their car? So that may be a good sign. Her getting in my car? Maybe was a way to make good time, but also could be put out there as a way to make something happen.

Jeff says I should have got her number. I feel that might have been too strong. What do you guys think?

[jcaron9gt4]

Yes you should have got it.

What are you waiting for, for a girl to ask you?

Not to be blunt, but grow a pair and ask...if she says no, you say okay, and be on your way.

[Random_Stranger]

Yes you should have got it.

What are you waiting for, for a girl to ask you?

Not to be blunt, but grow a pair and ask...if she says no, you say okay, and be on your way.

Ok. Then when an opportunity like that happens then I shall. It is just that women complain men are too too aggressive, and usually say they don't like when they try to get their number all fast. But then again, I am sure they are too aggressive here because it probably works. I know women like that here because it makes them feel more "valuable".

[jcaron9gt4]

Yes you should have got it.

What are you waiting for, for a girl to ask you?

Not to be blunt, but grow a pair and ask...if she says no, you say okay, and be on your way.

Ok. Then when an opportunity like that happens then I shall. It is just that women complain men are too too aggressive, and usually say they don't like when they try to get their number all fast. But then again, I am sure they are too aggressive here because it probably works. I know women like that here because it makes them feel more "valuable".

Asking a girl for their number is by no means aggressive and just shows that you have interest in them.
In that situation, it would've been the perfect opportunity to ask. She already showed interest by offering a ride, and then accepting a ride from a complete stranger.

[Sinyk]

Reading the last post made me think of Pirates of the Caribbean when Jack Sparrow said "If you were waiting for the opportune moment, that was it. "

[masterluie214]

Should have taken advatage of your situation man she alowed you in her car so that tells you right there she is not scard of you in anyway and then she got in your car that right there was your chance if i say so my self dont be scard of rejection the worst that can happen is you make a new friend dude and if she was hot like you say she was im about to start taking cool point away cause thats the 2nd time lol if you get the chance to talk to her again GET THE NUMBER (or make a new friend ) either way stop letting these things go by its like this joke i heard.

There was a priest who was stuck in the middle of the ocean and he prayed to god please save me nothing happen. few hours later a ship comes by and they ask sir do you need help the priest says no god will save me. Afew more hours later another ship comes by and asked sir please let me help you, priest says NO GOD WILL SAVE ME!. finaly the last ship came by asked the same thing please im here to save you, priest says NO! god will save me I know he will. no more ships come and the priest dies he gose to heven and sees god and he dosent understand so he asked god dear god I asked you to save me I prayed to you ...... god replys YOU IDIOT I SENT 3 SHIPS TO SAVE YOU AND YOU TURNED THEM ALL WAY LOL HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA OK I THOUGHT THAT WAS FUNNY

basicly dont pass it up

[forkee]

ummm.....yea u totally blew that one. you should have ask "so do u usually have classes around this time? or just on (day of week)? that way you can find out what kind of schedule she has (possibly suggesting that you can wait for her to get your parking the rest of the semester). hell you could have continued on the subject of your name and asked if you were gonna get lucky tomorrow too, lol. then you can continue by asking what classes shes taking, if theyre hard, easy, whatever. good/bad teacher. suggest maybe you can swap numbers so that when a particular class comes along maybe you can get/ receive some pointers, etc. this approach is way less creepy than flat out asking for their number. chicks see that as desparation rather than being straightforward.

"Oh you got a ride, so you were lucky", and I was like "Yeah, from a pretty lady, so I suppose I am quite lucky". "totally. i just wish i was this lucky every day. so whats your schedule tomorrow?"

never use pretty. use cute, hot, stunning, fine
never use lady (unless theyre old). use chick

"maybe i can get lucky again and get another ride from a hot chick."

fyi college people always ask if you want a ride to your car, especially if theyre late for class. it guarantees them a spot rather than having to stalk someone walking then realizing theres a car idling nearby that has first dibs on that parking space. think happy thoughts if u like, but if its an ugly chick or even a dude, theyre not trying to hit on you, they just want your parking.

[MaskedMan]

Ok. Then when an opportunity like that happens then I shall. It is just that women complain men are too too aggressive, and usually say they don't like when they try to get their number all fast. But then again, I am sure they are too aggressive here because it probably works. I know women like that here because it makes them feel more "valuable".

Dude, right there. You're caring too much about what you think women want to hear. You want to be the one who decides if they are good enough for you, not the other way around. You could have asked a question like, "Do you always give random strangers rides?" (no pun intended). Or you can find something she has in her car and ask her about it (or poke fun of her about it). Other than that, you're getting some really good opportunities, so you'll likely get another one in the future .

[Random_Stranger]

ummm.....yea u totally blew that one. you should have ask "so do u usually have classes around this time? or just on (day of week)? that way you can find out what kind of schedule she has (possibly suggesting that you can wait for her to get your parking the rest of the semester). hell you could have continued on the subject of your name and asked if you were gonna get lucky tomorrow too, lol. then you can continue by asking what classes shes taking, if theyre hard, easy, whatever. good/bad teacher. suggest maybe you can swap numbers so that when a particular class comes along maybe you can get/ receive some pointers, etc. this approach is way less creepy than flat out asking for their number. chicks see that as desparation rather than being straightforward.

"Oh you got a ride, so you were lucky", and I was like "Yeah, from a pretty lady, so I suppose I am quite lucky". "totally. i just wish i was this lucky every day. so whats your schedule tomorrow?"

never use pretty. use cute, hot, stunning, fine
never use lady (unless theyre old). use chick

"maybe i can get lucky again and get another ride from a hot chick."

fyi college people always ask if you want a ride to your car, especially if theyre late for class. it guarantees them a spot rather than having to stalk someone walking then realizing theres a car idling nearby that has first dibs on that parking space. think happy thoughts if u like, but if its an ugly chick or even a dude, theyre not trying to hit on you, they just want your parking.

True, but I asked her if she wanted to follow me for the spot. I have had them follow me before without saying anything before, or just following me. A ride? You know we got ex convicts an stuff at my college? Literally people straight up out the Pen. Notice in movies like The Cell, psychos are often related to "Bakersfield" in movies? They mean here for a reason.

I really hope I run into her again. I am going to try and leave class again early the next day on purpose! Sit outside the car on the phone and piss off everyone else until I see her up around that time. LOL It is going to be great!

[LewFX]

see im right, your a a$$-hoooo...whered pimp fausto go? when did this new what women want fausto come from?!!

[Random_Stranger]

see im right, your a a$$-hoooo...whered pimp fausto go? when did this new what women want fausto come from?!!

I talked to my mom about this, because she is a very passive person. She basically said "OH, you will see her again. When you do, then make your move". So let's see how lucky I am. So when I run into her, I can be like "Damn! I really am lucky! Now I gotta ask for your number. You know, so I can push this luck thing to it's limits". Or something bs like that.

[jimmykay]

basicly like everyone else has said, don't be affraid to ask for a number. its just a number. just dont go crazy with it and call like 7 times in a row if she doesnt answer the first time. My wife refuses to answer her phone if she doesnt know the number, so don't start overthinking it if you go call some girl and she doesnt answer.

[Random_Stranger]

basicly like everyone else has said, don't be affraid to ask for a number. its just a number. just dont go crazy with it and call like 7 times in a row if she doesnt answer the first time. My wife refuses to answer her phone if she doesnt know the number, so don't start overthinking it if you go call some girl and she doesnt answer.

No I am fully aware of that. That is why I offer my number because I grow tired of women complaining men bug. Considering the "Tease" factor that takes place in this town and end up giving it up to a complete stranger by the end of the day. You feel me? This town blows, but there are a few roses that do sprout about. Anyways, thanks for your input. Thank all of you.

[garin]

dude just go for it, swing for the frigin fences man, its how i work....be confident when your talking to them also, go back some time and if u come across her again strike up a convo, don't be a creeper about it just play it cool, then play off of that, usualy i go with, some thing along the lines, you have very kind eyes and a warm smile, drop a line like that after u make em laugh make eye contact and say some thing nice, ask her if you could treat her to a coffee or some thing along thos lines. and for god sakes dont use stupid lines man, you strike me as some one who knows better but if not dont drop " those are nice legs when do they open or any other pigish remarks, be urself and be confident, it works.
i know cause it works for me, and im an over weight hillbilly, and i do fine around women, it took a while to get use to talkin to em but its easy as pie now, any who good luck and cheers, p.s if all else fails offer her a drive in ur sweet ride, chicks love our cars

this guy is good. haha. not bad advice.